Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
