We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize