if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
high people should be assigned attendants
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
they're like a gay fantastic four
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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