clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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