well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize