I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize