Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize