So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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