i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
