Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
