Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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