it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
