Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
