he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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