SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
