There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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