I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
