YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
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I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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