great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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