i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
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