just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
