So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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