ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
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He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
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Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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