so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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