Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
They took my balls.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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