Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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