How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
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Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
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Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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