Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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