is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
