Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
