i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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