Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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