Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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