I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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