Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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