I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize