If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
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