It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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