also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You can't special order awesome
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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