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You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize