Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
