I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
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He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
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BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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