Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize