I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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