oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
