it was like his penis was on wheels.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
