apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize