So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
