I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
