is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
